I have a pet peeve.
And it’s pretty intense.
I can’t tell you how many blog posts I’ve read about this, but it numbers somewhere in the thousands, I’m sure. Here it is: Apparently, letting your children sleep in the bed with you is acceptable these days.
To start, I should probably explain that I didn’t grow up sleeping in my parents’ bed. I had to be on-my-death-bed-ill or significantly freaked out by a nightmare. I’m not even sure I can explain the significance of the word significantly to you.
Here’s the best part though: I have GREAT relationships with BOTH of my parents.
Something that, I’m sure, boggles the minds of those who are proponents of what they call “co-sleeping” – I just like to call it “putting-your-children-above-your-marriage.”
That’s what it is, right? Let’s just call a spade a spade here.
I know, I know. I’m not a parent yet. I’ll see what it’s like when I have that baby of my own who I’ll never want to part with even for one millisecond of the day. Right?
Here’s the thing.
When I got married, I made a vow before God and family, to love, honor, and cherish my husband until death parts us. That can’t happen the way it’s supposed to if our life in the bedroom is interrupted by our little
idol child. The bedroom is a vital part of the health of a marriage. VITAL. Necessary. It’s even commanded by God to be something that is a very common occurence. How can it be common if your 4-year-old is still shackin’ up next to you? Um, it can’t. That’s how.
As a parent, I’m required to “raise my child up in the way he should go”, which for me, is to know, love and fear God. All things “good” will come from that – discouraging selfishness, defiance, disrespect of authority; encouraging loving behavior, sharing, giving, and accountability for one’s actions.
Newsflash: that ain’t happenin’ while we’re sleeping.
Furthermore, if I’m constantly showing my child that they’re more important to me than my marriage to their father, I’m not really doing so well with the raising them up in the way they should go, am I? And beyond that, what will be left of my marriage when the kids are grown and gone – if we even make it that long?
No. Co-sleeping is just not an option. At all.
They can sleep in their room, we’ll sleep in ours, and then all meet up in the morning.
Plus, I’m not spending all this time painting stripes on the walls so they can be ignored.