**Warning: I ain’t gonna lie, this is kind of a long post. I don’t usually like to make them this long, but this one is worth it. I promise**
I have a confession to make:
I NEVER check my voice-mail. NEVER.
Ok, not never, just rarely. Very rarely.
As in, I wait until I have about 30+ voice-mail to check it, because the thought of talking to people on the phone makes me crazy. Seriously. What is SO important that you can’t wait to tell me until we see one another again?
You should be able to come to the conclusion that since I’m able to get 30+ voice-mails so quickly, that I never actually answer my phone. There are 4 reasons for this.
1. When I’m at work, I put my phone on silent so as not to disturb those with whom I work. I always forget to take it off of silent mode once work is over and therefore rarely hear it ring.
2. I’m a busy lady. Seriously. I work (including the “Nanny” thing) about 45-50 hours a week, plus I take 3, three-hour classes and volunteer for youth group on FRIDAY nights. This leaves Saturday (when I clean and have some semblance of a social life) Wednesday (night, in which I usually give myself a mid-week break or do homework) and Sunday in which I rest (or try to) because, well, God did and so should I. So, I’m sure that it’s obvious to you that because my personal time is so precious, the last thing I want to be bothered with is a phone call.
3. I’m an administrative assistant. It is MY JOB to answer phones (among other things) and so even if my schedule wasn’t as crazy as number 2 indicates, the likelihood that I would spend time on the phone after work isn’t all that great. Plus, right after I leave work and for the next hour thereafter my first inclination after hearing any phone ring is to pick up and say “Thank you for calling Glasgow Church, this is Fancythis, how may I help you?”
4. I’m lazy. On the off-chance that I remembered to take my phone off of silent mode, and I hear it ringing, it’s usually in some place which requires that I get up from the couch (a place I rarely sit these days) walk over to my purse, dig the phone out, and say hello. That’s too much effort for anyone but my husband. And those are just the facts.
There are exceptions to those rules. Like a phone number I don’t recognize, or someone who wouldn’t ordinarily call me. I will answer the phone, or at the very least, check voice-mail on those particular occasions.
Tonight was one of those exceptional nights in that BOTH exceptions to the rules occurred. All in one day!
One of my former youth leaders (one of the ones who’s getting married and therefore required a brand new dress purchase) called today. He rarely calls me and so I felt this warranted a call-back. He left a voice-mail, but why spend time listening to it if I’m just calling him back anyway and then I’ll have to listen to why he called me twice. Twice! No thank you. So I called, and got sent straight to his voice-mail where I left some clever message like “Hey, it’s Fancythis returning your call, call me back!” (groundbreaking, I tell you) and went about my merry way.
Fast-forward to class tonight.
I was sitting there, not paying attention to my professor, when I noticed that someone was calling. It was a number I didn’t recognize and get this – they called 2 times in the span of 5 minutes! Surely this must be important (not important enough to walk out of class to make sure it wasn’t urgent, mind you) and so I will DEFINITELY be checking voice-mail after this!
So I did.
When I got to the voice-mail left earlier in the day by my former youth leader, do you know what it said Internets, do you? Well I’ll tell you, because of course you don’t!
It said (the paraphrased version):
“Hey Fancythis, it’s “former youth leader”. I was just calling to make sure that you would be at youth group tomorrow night during my talk because I’m going to be bringing you up and utilizing you as part of it. Also, I have something to tell you, but I won’t tell you until tomorrow night in front of the youth group.”
I know right? Who else isn’t TOTALLY dying to find out what the heck is going on?!
I didn’t even care about the other message I got from the person who called me twice in a row. Something about I owe $60 for a bridesmaid dress that I was fitted for like, forever ago, and I have to pay by Saturday otherwise I won’t get the dress. But darnit, I haven’t cared about picking up the dress because they’ve called the wedding off 80,000 times! I don’t want to pay that $60 if this dress ain’t gettin’ put to good use, savvy?
But man, what could this other message mean?! Did I win the lottery? Did he go straight to President Bush and demand that my husband be sent home to me immediately and they’re going to surprise me at youth group tomorrow? What could it be?
I don’t know. But as soon as I know, you’ll know.
After other more important people, I mean.