I MAY HAVE A JOB SOON PEOPLE!!!!!
Did you read that? Carefully, I mean. In English? Not that there’s another option. Of a language to read that in, I mean. Because if it’s written in English that surely that’s the language you would read it in. Ok.
Now that that’s out of the way, lets get to the topic at hand.
Today, while I was working hard on my second to last day at Big Monster Company, I received a phone call from a number I had never before seen, and instead of ignoring it which I am wont to do with an unfamiliar number, I picked up. I’m glad.
It was a company I had applied to about a month ago and never heard from afterwards, because why would you call a worthy, skillful candidate back right away? You’re supposed to ignore them for a month, didn’t you know that? Unemployed? Don’t worry, that job you applied for a month ago will be calling you any day now.
So they called, and I picked up. And the person on the phone told me that they may have a position opening soon that I may be interested in, can they have a moment of my time to ask me a few questions. And it was all I could do not to dance and sing and shout YES! really loudly in the person’s ear because really, my current job is not important enough to stop me from trying to obtain another.
So we chatted. About my skill set and what they’re looking for in a person that they would like to fill this particular position. But I kept wondering why this person was talking about the position as if someone already had it.
Turns out someone does already have the position. They’re looking to can her because she’s not all that great at what she does and for some reason, the me on paper sounds good enough to replace this poor woman. (which I would like to point out is very odd, because since I don’t have a college education, I feel as though I sell myself much better in person, but oh well)
So I’m supposed to use “the utmost discretion” because they don’t want the other woman to know that they’re looking to replace her. They gave me all of their personal contact information (phone,email) not their business information because they don’t want the old woman to find out about me.
My interpretation of “the utmost discretion” is to, of course, write about it here.
I’m sorry old woman, if you happen to read this, but apparently, I make them feel young and alive again and you just nag and tell them that they can’t spend time with their friends and yell all the time like, would they clean up after themselves already?! I don’t put that kind of pressure on them.
Plus you’ve kind of let yourself go, and I’m younger and prettier and really, isn’t that all that matters in a relationship like this?