gettin’ my chubby rear (and other parts) into shape

Ok, first things first.

I do not think I’m fat.

But I am not happy with how I look. Below the neck. I don’t think I got such a rotten deal from the neck up. Okay, I know I didn’t get a rotten deal from the neck up. That is not conceit, it’s just the facts man.

Anyway, my BIGGEST goal while hubby is gone is to get into hawt body shape. (please note the intensity)

I feel that since he’ll be gone for so long, he deserves the hotness upon his return. Here’s the conclusion that I’ve come to, I cannot be unrealistic. If I’m unrealistic, I’ll never acheive my goals. I know what I’m capable of. And so, with the combination of a fabulous diet and some semi-strenuous workouts (designed by my brother Jake, who at the age of 17 has a sick body) I want to look like this:

I know this isn’t the greatest picture, but it was the only one I could find of her with clothes on. Ahem.

Anyway, why I picked Jessica Biel:

-She’s tall (5′7″ to my 5′9 1/2″)
-She’s not a bean pole
-We have sort of the same build width-wise

That’s it so far.

So myself and some women at my church are going to be meeting every Thursday (morning, during work hours!) to report our weekly progress.

But wait, there’s more!

I’m going to be reporting to you every week as well, and once a month, I’ll post a picture! How’s that for dedication?! So, without further ado, here are my stats:

Height: 5′10″ (we’ll just round up)

Weight: 180.5 (lbs)

Goal: 145 (lbs)

Current pictures: (UGH)

Here goes nuthin’!

dear luke

Hey,

I’m so bummed that we got disconnected the other day. I agree with you, our conversation was really good, and I’m so upset that we couldn’t finish.

I actually did try to reboot the Internet several times in an attempt to talk to you again, but alas, it wasn’t meant to be.

I hate email because it’s so impersonal, and yet, it really is the only way that I can frequently, and without interruption, communicate with you.

I guess really, I just hate that you’re gone. That’s really the heart of the issue, huh?

The thing that I struggle with the most is this inner battle that I’m fighting. I want so desperately to talk to you all of the time and I miss you when I can’t. However, when I do talk to you whether it’s via phone, im/webcam, or email, I am reminded of the fact that you aren’t just away for the weekend only to return to me Sunday night, but you’re away for a year and won’t return until December. It really is easier sometimes not to talk to or hear from you at all, because then I don’t think about you as much, and then I don’t cry over you so much.

I’m sure this is really selfish of me to bring you down, but you’re the only person who understands me and how I’m feeling in this very moment. You’re the only one who knows exactly what I’m going through and I hate that. I wish that there were someone else that I could depress with my woeful tales of sadness and depression. I wish that I could only be happy when I’m “talking” to you.

There are days when I don’t even want to get out of bed because of how sad I am. There are days when the pain is so overwhelming I just want to sleep instead of feel. There are days when December seems so far away, so distant, it’s like it will never come around.

I feel fake because I just plaster my smile on so that no one else has to be uncomfortable around me. I’m sure that’s making things worse, but it’s the only way that I know how to deal with this. I feel like if I constantly express my sadness, people will be worn out by me and I’ll become one of those EGR people that others avoid because I would just be a walking cloud.

Sometimes when I dream, it’s about you, and you’re here and we’re still living out our marriage the way we did our first year, just the 2 of us in our apartment. When I wake up it’s a cruel reality that I’m greeted with.

I long for the day when we can have that again. I think about it constantly. I know you do to.

I pray for you everyday. Not so much for your safety (although, hello, of course that’s on my mind too!) but for your heart. I know that everything I’ve said, you’re feeling too and I want you to know that. I am just as aware of your feelings and how this is affecting you as I am about myself. (I will admit, that sometimes it’s easier to focus on me, because I’m living with me)

I’m so proud of what you’re doing and how you and ALL of your guys are sacrificing. I pray for them too, and their families.

I can’t imagine having to be a single mom for a year, and that is the only thing that’s making this easier. Thinking about how little Jack will grow so much before his Daddy can see him again. And all the other kids too. The things that your men are missing out on are huge, and so how can I be so selfish, when they’ve left behind so much more?

It’s all about perspective. God is giving me that. Slowly but surely.

I hope you’re having so much fun. I hope you’re able to accomplish big and little things while you’re there. I hope that we are both better spouses to one another upon your return. I hope we both remember in this time that God is sovereign, and we can trust him.

I hope you know that I love you and miss you.

More than you know.

All my love,

Laura

on an otherwise sucky day

This morning when I got in to work I looked at my cell phone and noticed that I had a new text message.

It was from my little brother, Zach.

“What are you doing tonight?” it read

“Nothing much, I have class” I replied, “Why?”

“Well, it’s Valentine’s Day” he said, “If you don’t have plans, I’d like to go out with you.”

This is why I love my little brother. He’s actually seeing someone right now too, and he still would sacrifice a “hot date” to take me out in the hopes that it’ll get my mind off of the fact that I’ll be spending this Valentine’s Day without my Hubby.

I just love him.

unpopular

Y’know, amidst all the drama of the upcoming election, it’s difficult not to get caught up in all of it without even realizing why my stance is as strong as it is against certain things.

My church has a youtube account, and every now and then I like to browse and see what’s on there, and today I found this.

Pastor Dan’s message may be unpopular in our culture today, but it’s something that Christians need to remember.

Because even though our Christ was a “good man”, the ways in which he differs from the other “good prophets” make us who we say we are.

We should vote differently. But more importantly, we should live differently.

Which one of these is not like the other?

The Cross, because it didn’t end there, and that’s the most important difference of them all.

wordless wednesday – happy one-month-later birthday to you!

cake

I’ve decided that there are lots of people in my life opening there own businesses.

My mom’s cousin (which would make her my 1st cousin once removed? 2nd cousin?) just opened her own dessert business called Cake.

Her stuff is awesome!

I’ve been to 2 of her open houses to date, and let me tell ya, I’d better avoid going to any more if I want to keep my fabulous figure!

Anyway, you should go check her out because she’s super-talented!

She made the lamb cookies we had at Lemon’s shower last weekend and not only did they look fabulous, but they tasted great too!

And, not that this really matters in terms of how good she is, but her business colors were inspired by my wedding colors – pink & brown!

How fun!

Now, go buy something.

SURPRISE!!!!

Well, you all know that (best friend) Lemons is preggers with her first ever little bundle.

So we had to throw her a shower!

It was Saturday, February 9th and it was a blast! Here’s the proof……

the lone ranger

Not much has been happening with me over the last few days.

I’ve been stuck at home with 5-ish other sick people.

We’re all about sharing here at my parent’s house.

My sister had it first. Bad headache, queasy stomach, clogged head, fever. So we quarantined her to the den which is on the far side of my parent’s house.

Then, my brother Jacob got it. He and my sister are twins, and this really is the only explanation we can come up with as to how he got it. Surprisingly, out of all of us (kids), they come into contact with each other far less than the rest of us. It’s not that they don’t like each other, they just have different stuff goin’ on.

Then, me and my brother Zach got it at the same time, around Monday into Tuesday. Then, my dad got it. Yesterday, my mom got it.

If you’ve been counting, that’s 6 people total who have the plague.

“Six?” you say “Aren’t there seven people in your family.”

Yes there are. Ben is the only one who hasn’t gotten it yet.

Let’s see how much longer he can hold out……

bleh

A special thanks to everyone out there who passed their germs along to me, thus causing this plague which I’m dealing with.

Stomach ache

Dry cough

Clogged head

 I do so appreciate it.

back to basics

Today was the deadline for me to turn in my letters of recommendation to the school, and, being the procrastinator that I am, I waited until today to turn in the final one.

Since I had the girls today, I gave them this overly long-winded speech on the way to the school about how we’re going into a building that’s a school and a workplace (for some people) and how they need to be very quiet since some people will be learning and other people will be working.

“Ok” they both said enthusiastically, “we’ll be veerrrry quiet.”

As promised, they were both silent, even when others were talking to them (they have a tendency to be very shy) and things were just lovely.

On the way out the door, I was praising the girls for their wonderful behavior, when we passed another student.

“SSHHHHH Miss Fancythis! You have to be quiet!” said M

“No, not now, we’re outside.” I replied

“I know, but that girl is going inside to learn her letters, so we should be quiet for her.”

If only I had registered for that class.